My Life in a Blender

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This morning, I sent out a tweet.

https://twitter.com/beinspired1/status/214766800028708864

I’m ready to live my strongest life (I think anyway…sometimes I feel more ready than others…today I feel really ready) and that means embracing every aspect of who I am…the good…the bad…the ugly.  And, quite frankly, if you don’t like…maybe we just aren’t meant to be together.

Marcus Buckingham talks about finding balance and how this isn’t really about balance of everything in your life.  It’s about balance of everything you love…those moments you want to hang out to and cherish.

My days run together…work….home….family….me-time….art…and the occasion margarita.  Every time I try to get up a little earlier…work…wrap it up mid to late afternoon…have my evening free to do whatever…it just doesn’t fucking work.

I’m good for a while…that’s about it…and then the obligatory self-loathing begins.  I suck…I can’t do anything right…this should be so easy…and yet it’s just so hard.

You know what’s funny?  When I was in school, I did this project around women designers.  I fell in love with Marian Bantjes, a designer and illustrator from the Canadian west coast.  She lives on this little island and speaks of all the flavors of green she sees around her, the cooler weather with both a touch of sun and rain, and how much she truly loves it there.

When asked to describe her day, she casually shared that she gets up sometime between 6 and 11am, eats a little, works a little, walks a little, spends time with friends, paints a little, eats a little more and then works again until somewhere in between 11pm and 2am before she heads off to bed for some restful slumber only to do it again the very next day.  She does it because she loves it and because it works for her.

{Insert AHA! moment here}

Seriously!  This woman has my dream schedule and I’m here doing the same things and feeling it’s wrong.  Say what??!?!

I live a life that allows me this freedom…the freedom I wanted and still want…to do what I want, when I want.  In the middle of writing this post, I got up and made my favorite salad….just because it sounded good and I could.  That’s what I want my day to look like.  Some structure, but not too much, and the ability to get up in the midst of it all to cook noodles, slice up gorgeous, juicy red tomatoes and gourmet cucumbers, to be mixed in a bowl with olive oil + vinegar.

saladI can stand at the counter and take in the aroma of the tomatoes with each and every slice, using the awesome knives my mom gave me for my new home.  I can enjoy the feeling of my mouth watering in anticipation of the finished product.  I can do it in the middle of the day, just because I want to.

I also did a load of dishes, turned on iTunes fora little chillaxin’, and played with my cats.  I had a client call, finished a logo, worked on a website, listened to the first two interviews in Catherine Just’s Soul*full Summit {totally awesome BTW}, and spent a little time on Facebook and Twitter.

It’s 3pm now and I can still taste the sassiness of the vinegar from the salad in my mouth mixed with smooth texture of olive oil dancing along side all the spices, veggies and pasta.  I’m still listening to my favorite music as I wrap up this post.

This is my life in a blender.  I think I’ll go sit out on the deck for a while or maybe do another zentangle or maybe work a little more…because I can.

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