How To Make Those Damn Hard Decisions

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question markHave you ever had a really difficult decision to make and just felt like you had no idea how to make the “right” choice?

Life is full of decision-making opportunities and, sometimes, it’s just hard to know what option is the right one.  We, especially women, want to make sure we have all the facts…everything that could possible matter needs to be on the table.  We analyze.  We ask our friends.  We search the internet. We throw it out in social media. We talk to our coach or psychic.  We do whatever it takes to make sure we have all the details.

And then we still can’t decide.  What if we missed something?

I have a hard time making decisions.  I am so afraid I’m missing something that would make a difference and then I’ll regret what I decided.  I worry that one decision would be considerably better than another.  I used to ask everyone I knew what they thought, hoping to gather enough.  Still, I could barely decide.  I was like a kid in a candy store with $1.  Oh wait, brief trip down memory lane – that wouldn’t go far today.  I was like an adult in a Godiva chocolate store with a $50 bill.

Decisions are still sometimes challenging. They are even more so when it seems like one decision affects several major areas in our lives.  For example, leaving a job isn’t just about leaving a job.  It has potential to create issues with a significant other or other family members who don’t agree with our decision.  It has potential to make it harder to pay our bills.  So it’s a very difficult decision to make for most.

I’m proud to say I’ve been able to make those hard choices in my life…leaving a job, leaving a marriage, moving to a new town and home…and they were still hard to make.  Every day, most of us are faced with some sort of decision or another.   How do we get through life with so many choices?!?!

Some of the major decisions I’ve made were made because one option was just to painful to consider.  For example, staying in the job I had was killing me every day.  I knew I had to leave or stand to be miserable for the rest of my life.  Sometimes, it’s just that simple.  I knew it wouldn’t be easy to make the change but I knew I had to.  Sometimes, it’s more complicated.  Here are some tips to get you through those tougher decisions…

  • Always consider the question:  Is this choice one made from love or fear?  Always choose love.  Love for yourself.
  • Flip a coin.  It isn’t the answer that provides guidance.  It’s how you feel about the answer.  Were you happy with the end that showed up or were you really wishing for a different outcome?  This will show you what’s in your heart.
  • Can you look at yourself in the mirror when you consider the choices?  Which one makes you feel proud and has you standing in your true authentic self?
  • Think about some of the best choices you’ve made in your life…how did you make those?
  • Sit quietly on the couch doing nothing for 10 minutes.  See what comes up.
  • If you have to convince yourself something is a good idea…it might not be…or is it fear holding you back?
  • Don’t think so much…feel.
  • Know your core values and make choices that align with them.
What’s a difficult decision you had to make and how did you make it?
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