The Basics of Orgasmic Meditation
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Orgasmic Meditation, also known as OM, is a spiritual practice being taught around the world. When I first heard the term, I thought to myself…is this for real? It seemed seemed like some hockey practice and I wasn’t sure I understood or would buy into it.
True to my personality, the research began – including a 5+ hour online workshop.
The theory is you work with a partner for 15 minutes. The woman is in a comfortable reclined position with her legs spread eagle with no pants on. The man proceeds to rub her clit at about 1pm on, as I saw it referred to somewhere, the clit clock. This is the area where most of the nerves reside and is most sensitive, for that reason.
While the man is rubbing on this spot, the woman is (hopefully) enjoying the rub down and also commenting on what she is experiencing…what she’s feeling. She is as specific as possible about those feelings. The partner is also sharing their experience…what they see, what they feel, etc.
The goal isn’t necessarily to climax but that does happen some times. The goal is to be fully present in the experience and connect with your body and your feelings. The goal is to connect with others…to really experience true intimacy and be comfortable with it.
I recently took an online workshop through the Essentials of Orgasmic Meditation, available through Conscious 2, and I paused the video about 10 minutes into it to go take care of some laundry and get a snack. I come back to the video and about two minutes later, they are talking about paying attention to if we feel we need to step away…go get a snack, take care of a task…this might mean something is making us a bit uncomfortable. I had to laugh at the accuracy of that statement…I took a break right after the conversation about emotionally-charged words.
They use emotionally-charged words like pussy and cock as a way of reconnecting and owning those parts of your body without shame or embarrassment. They also use safe words like in BDSM. They recommend green, yellow, and red. Green is go. Yellow is slow down…stuff’s coming up for me. And red is stop – it means you can’t stay present any longer. The partner must always honor these requests so the woman feels safe.
So, obviously, I’m not that comfortable with words like pussy and cock. I’m not sure why…they seem kind of juvenile but it sounds like it’s a topic for me to explore…another time. And, while I crave deep intimacy, I’m also a bit afraid of it. Being vulnerable isn’t easy for me…it’s a process, for sure.
So back to OMing. If you are wondering, yes, people take workshops on this practice in person and engage in it in a room full of people. There are also trained practitioners (strokers) you can utilize if you aren’t in a relationship at all or aren’t in a relationship where you feel comfortable engaging in this process.
Here are my thoughts on this practice…
- I find myself wondering, right off the bat, how do they find practitioners or even ensure that the people in the workshops aren’t crazy molesters. While the idea of taking a workshop or going to a seasoned practitioner is intriguing, I’m not sure I’d feel safe in that space. I do think they work hard to manage this and maybe it’s just me but that’s where I’m at.
- This is definitely a practice that will push your boundaries and comfort level. And it’s a practice that takes practice.
- Kim Anami wrote a post about talking during sex and the foundation of her post was that, the more you talk, the more comfortable you get talking. This means you can increase your satisfaction through sharing what you love and want more of in and out of the bedroom as well as address issues as they come up. Communication is so powerful.
- It can be a practice that really improves how well you know your body and how connected you are to your feelings as well as how connected you are to your partner (if you are doing it with them).
- I know the power an orgasm has and I know that when we are leading up to an orgasm and then it occurs, it’s one of the few times in our life that we are fully present and engaged…in fact, it’s impossible to think or do anything else in that moment. Because of this knowledge, I see the power of this practice.
Because of my last point above, I would absolutely promote this technique. It can be a fun way to stay present and not necessarily get wrapped up in an end result since it’s not really about having an orgasm. The hubby and I have tried this once…kind of a modified version since I we hadn’t taken a workshop or anything. I am definitely looking forward to doing more of this and I hope he is too 🙂
What are your thoughts on this practice?