My last three years in my W2 job (which I left about 8 years ago), I knew I needed to leave. I didn’t belong there anymore. I felt like I was dying inside. A slow and painful death. It took me those three years after the awareness hit to actually take the plunge and give my notice and walk out those doors.
When I noticed my job was killing me, that was the moment it would have been in my best interests to leave. I just wasn’t ready. I didn’t have the courage to make such a big decision. I already knew I had a business brewing inside of me but I wasn’t sure I could make a go of it and was too afraid to try.
I’m grateful that it only took me three years because I realize that some never get the courage to leave and stay in a soul-sucking job for years and years. They blame the job, just as I did, for robbing them of their happiness…of their sense of fulfillment…of their energy.
But it isn’t the job.
As soon as I realized it was time for me to leave because the environment was no longer a healthy one for me to be in, I became responsible for my own happiness and success 100%. I had an awareness I wasn’t happy and I stayed there. I died a little bit inside every day for three years but it wasn’t my job that was killing me. It was my choice to stay.
And my choice was killing me. Not the job.
I went through some really tough years when I first left my job. A separation from my husband, the loss of my home, bankruptcy. It was really hard. And there hasn’t been a single moment…not a single second…that I’ve ever looked back and wished I’d stayed. My well-being was more important than any financial freedom at that point. I knew things would end up okay financially, as long as I took care of everything else first. Staying in that job was like being in jail…there was no freedom. Leaving gave me the freedom and the bottom line was and continues to be that my needs are always met.
Yours will be too if you have a difficult choice to make and you make the decision that screams life is too short (because it is) and you deserve better (because you do).
At the end of the day, you must take responsibility for the choices you make in your life. As soon as you are aware something no longer serves you, if you choose to stay in that situation or environment, you are the one killing yourself a little bit every day…not the situation or environment. The healing begins with the end of the blame. The confidence comes with an understanding you are the only one in charge of your life.
What choice will you make today?